In the name of Allah,
just now, my jr just came by to give me a present^^ what a nice jr^^ arigatou ne...
just now, my sis called me congrats me being a year older...i can't meet her till this August..
just now, the sun shine bright in the sky, but guess rain will come after this...
live is so short..
'...mereka merasa seakan-akan hanya (sebentar saja) tinggal (di dunia) pada waktu petang atau pagi hari' (79:46)
i still remember,this is what i heard the first time i went to ta'lim in indonesia..on the nice Sunday morning, the ustaz said that the life on this world is extremely short than the afterlife.. that is absolutely true..yesterday, i was a 20years old human being on this planet..n today, i am the 21years old human being, still on this planet..
when i recalled bac,time flies soooo fast...this is the third year i celebrated bday in indonesia n mannnny things happened along this 3 years..these past few months, my mind, my heart n myself was not in a stable state...yesterday also,i feel so sad,dunno why..i keep thinking what have i done along this life? n will i still breathing the next day?? suddenly, i become so scared..maybe one of the ibrah people dunno when to die is so we keep struggling to live...Hmmm..guess time is also one of the 'ujian' that we should be aware..
It seems that my body also aware that i'm not in a stable state along these months..It keeps troubling me until a sis said, are u stress?? Body tends to show that we are in a stress mode.. Sincerely, i dunno if i'm stress or not... sometimes, i really dunno myself...till one time, i'll keep thinking till i can't think anymore...i dunno what's wrong with me..is this just a phase of life??searching for our own identity?? whatever it is, i dun't like what i feel these days...it seems that i've lost..Allah,please find me n put me bac on the right way...Onegai...
days before, my lecturer said that we, human can create human by the latest gene maping technology..then,i think how is it to be a human without a 'ruh'?? they will be emotionless, n didn't have a mission in this life..will they keep struggling to live like the normal n will they keep forcing themselves to the unknown tomorrow??once again,i'm asking for the unknowing answer..baaka da yo??
kino wa, i'm walking in my pace of life,
kyou wa, i still walking in my pace of life,
till then, i'll keep walking in my pace of life,
no matter how stress, hurt n sad i might be,
no matter how happy n grateful i would be,
it's just how it should be
everybody got their own story n their own pace
As HE make my story the bestest for me
so,who am i n where am i to keep judging n sighing??
kyou wa will be kino wa..
n ashita he will be the next kyou wa..
for sure,ashita he will be better than kyou ne...
'Dan kami akan menambah petunjuk kepada mereka yang telah mendapat petunjuk.Dan amal-amal saleh yang kekal itu lebih baik pahalanya di sisi Tuhanmu dan lebih baik kesudahannya'
(19:76)
To my parents,timekasey for all the hardship raising me up till today^^
To my siblings,xie xie for laughing n fighting with me^^
To all my sensei,merci for teaching me till now^^
To my tomodachis',arigatou..arigatou..i'll treasure every single of u^^
To all my enemies, ookini nee..
To my murabbis', komawoyo..for showing me n lead me finding the 'hikari' ^^
To my akhwats, gracies..hikari wo mezashite, issho ni ganbarimasu!!
To all people that came by n past by in my 21years chronology of life, hontouni arigatou...
Jazakillah khair to all the memories n soon-to-be memories^^
N for the first n last, syukran to ALLAH, now n always^^
Minna-san,thank you for making me 'me' today^^
1344-wed-10022010
